![](\"https:\/\/cdn.images.express.co.uk\/img\/dynamic\/79\/590x\/secondary\/4935380.jpg?r=1693428865101\")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
Sitting in the garden of his London mansion, Simon Cowell is a picture of serenity as a whirlwind of activity unfolds around him.<\/p>\n
Son Eric is running about in an Arsenal shirt, fiancee Lauren is showing an estate agent about the house ahead of its impending sale, while three of his assistants are tapping away on laptops.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s the morning after the Britain\u2019s Got Talent final \u2013 when Simon would usually be racked with nerves awaiting news of the overnight ratings.<\/p>\n
But as he quietly nurses a cup of tea and his beloved dogs play by his feet, his mind is a million miles away from the day-job.<\/p>\n
In fact, what we see before us is a very different Simon altogether. It\u2019s a change, he ascribes to discovering therapy for the first time, at the age of 63.<\/p>\n
Simon says: \u201cWhen I see my friends, the first thing I talk about is how therapy has had this super positive effect on my life. \u201cI wish I had done this 10 or 20 years ago…it\u2019s like a weight has lifted off my shoulders.\u201d<\/p>\n
Simon is so passionate about his new weekly therapy sessions, he immediately agreed to be the first guest on our sister paper the Daily Mirror\u2019s Men in Mind podcast.<\/p>\n
The mini-series, in association with mental health charity Mind, will see some of the UK\u2019s biggest male stars open up about their mental health.<\/p>\n
Mind\u2019s research found that a quarter of men said feeling embarrassed was the main reason stopping them from seeking help.<\/p>\n
READ MORE <\/strong> Simon Cowell believed his depression was ‘just his character trait’<\/strong><\/p>\n With one in eight men affected by mental health problems in any given year, the podcast\u2019s aim is simple: To encourage more to open up.<\/p>\n It\u2019s a cause close to Simon\u2019s heart. He wishes he had not left it so late in life to talk about his own feelings. The star says: \u201cIf you\u2019d said to me, \u2018Simon, we\u2019re going to be sitting down in your garden, talking about mental health,\u2019 I\u2019d be going, \u2018Have I lost my mind or something?\u2019<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m not a doctor. I\u2019m not an expert. But in my own way I\u2019ve started to understand it more and done things myself for my mental health in a positive way.<\/p>\n \u201cNow I am happy to talk about it to encourage others.\u201d To understand why Simon reached out to a therapist, you need only rewind the clock back a few years to the beginning of the Covid pandemic.<\/p>\n He says: \u201cI\u2019ve suffered from depression over the years, but I just thought, \u2018Well, that\u2019s my character trait. I get down\u2019. And then I suppose Covid was the real catalyst.\u201d<\/p>\n Like many people during the pandemic, Simon\u2019s mental health deteriorated. He describes being in a constant state of anxiety.<\/p>\n Don’t miss… <\/strong> We use your sign-up to provide content in ways you’ve consented to and to improve our understanding of you. This may include adverts from us and 3rd parties based on our understanding. You can unsubscribe at any time. More info<\/p>\n \u201cIn the very, very early stages, some friends of mine got really ill \u2013 and I\u2019m talking really ill,\u201d he says. \u201cSo, I thought, \u2018God, if I catch this, maybe the same thing\u2019s going to happen to me, Eric and Lauren\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n Watching the news only made things worse and he consulted endless doctors to try to work out how best to protect his family.<\/p>\n \u201cI didn\u2019t know what was true or not, I just didn\u2019t have a clue other than I was petrified about catching it. Just petrified.\u201d<\/p>\n Simon, Lauren and Eric stayed in Los Angeles for most of the year and Simon \u201cdidn\u2019t see anybody\u201d bar the occasional visitor who had to be tested for Covid before they were allowed to see him.<\/p>\n He recalls: \u201cI\u2019m just basically in my house, not going out and wearing masks all the time. I\u2019m not exaggerating, I probably was tested about a thousand times.\u201d<\/p>\n To make matters worse, Simon was agonising over Britain\u2019s Got Talent and whether to go ahead with filming in the UK.<\/p>\n The emergence of a new, more infectious variant saw him finally pull the plug. \u201cI felt a lot of responsibility at that point,\u201d he says.<\/p>\n \u201cI just didn\u2019t know what was the correct thing to do other than don\u2019t chance it, don\u2019t risk it.\u201d In the end, Simon did catch Covid. but thankfully suffered no ill effects.<\/p>\n But as the world slowly returned to normal, he knew he couldn\u2019t go on like that anymore. So he started reading up about ways to improve his mental health.<\/p>\n He explains: \u201cAs things started to calm down a bit, it was almost like, \u2018Now I\u2019ve got to go from there back into the real world. How do I feel about that?\u2019<\/p>\n \u201cSo, I started to read up about stuff, teach myself. Then, fortunately, I met some friends who had benefited from therapy.<\/p>\n \u201cAnd that\u2019s when I thought, \u2018You know what? I\u2019ve kind of looked after my body through diet and exercise, pretty well over the years. But what have I done about my brain and my mind?\u2019<\/p>\n \u201cAnd the answer was, \u2018Nothing. And now\u2019s the time to do it.\u2019 \u201cSo, it was almost like my head going to the gym.\u201d Simon remembers the pang of apprehension when he first knocked on the therapist\u2019s door and entered the room.<\/p>\n \u201cI made the appointment and I sat down, really embarrassed and I said, \u2018Look, I just don\u2019t know where to start\u2019,\u201d he laughs. \u201cBut within about 20 minutes it was as if I\u2019d known him for 10, 20 years. He put me so much at ease.<\/p>\n \u201cYou realise you\u2019re talking to a professional. And they don\u2019t judge you. They listen to you.\u201d With the therapist\u2019s help and his own desire to learn, Simon slowly worked through his problems.<\/p>\n And the two men even \u00admanaged to unpick Simon\u2019s unhealthy obsession with \u00adchasing ratings. \u201cHe asked me, \u2018Do you consider your best work to be the highest rated thing you\u2019ve ever done?\u2019And I said, \u2018No.\u2019<\/p>\n \u201cAnd he said, \u2018So why are you judging yourself on that?\u2019\u201d Simon\u2019s response to his team was almost instantaneous.<\/p>\n \u201cI sent an email saying, \u2018That\u2019s it. I don\u2019t want to know about ratings anymore\u2019. It\u2019s quite incredible because it now doesn\u2019t feel like you\u2019re chasing something.<\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019re just making something you like in the hope that other people like it as well. If they don\u2019t, they don\u2019t.\u201d Sitting opposite Simon, and seeing him looking so relaxed, it\u2019s easy to tell that he is so much more at peace with himself.<\/p>\n And before our podcast recording, he tells me he has now also stopped following the news. He has also ditched his phone altogether \u2013 so even the Phillip Schofield scandal blissfully passed him by.<\/p>\n He hopes going public about his therapy will encourage other men to talk about their feelings more. \u201cThere\u2019s nothing to be fearful of and no one\u2019s going to look at you or judge you differently,\u201d he says.<\/p>\n \u201cAs a kid, it was always, \u2018Don\u2019t cry. Be a man\u2019. But it\u2019s nothing to be ashamed of and it\u2019s healthy to almost go the other way.<\/p>\n \u201cWe\u2019re not all made of steel and there\u2019s going to be times in our lives where we just need somebody to talk to.\u201d As for those BGT ratings, don\u2019t tell Simon\u2026but six million viewers wasn\u2019t too shabby after all.<\/p>\n![](\"https:\/\/cdn.images.express.co.uk\/img\/dynamic\/79\/590x\/secondary\/4935391.jpg?r=1693428865152\")
<\/p>\n
Simon Cowell \u2018unaware of Schofield scandal\u2019 due to behind scenes struggles[LATEST] <\/strong>
Simon Cowell seeing therapist after becoming \u2018petrified\u2019 to leave his house[REVEAL] <\/strong>
Simon Cowell imposed email ban on BGT ratings after seeing therapist[INSIGHT] <\/strong><\/p>\n